Holly-da-da-DAZE!

I can already smell Christmas from here! I haven't done any updates for a month! It's mostly lack of inspiration, I suppose.

School's been a hectic, pain in the ass, so I am gratefully thankful that it's the holidays. My marks are suffering big time and I would hate to discuss that matter on my blog. Can anyone please tell me why school is such a delicious recipe for depression.

On another note, I am mighty excited for Christmas!! I don't have any big arrangements planned out, but the snow and all-around Christmas spirit make it super exciting. My family and my aunt's are having a Christmas dinner, however, on the 25th =). As for New Year's, I still don't know where my family is planning to go, but I'm sure it'll be fun!

What are you guys doing for the holidays? =D

Speaking of New Year's, I have to get on my resolutions. I didn't make any for this year, so I'll try making one for next year. Hopefully I get to keep them all. Haha..! I'm not going to make this post long, so I'll end it here.

For those who celebrate it, I wish you a very jolly Christmas!! And for those who don't, have a safe and marvellous holiday!

Love your lives and others, and always live in love.

Much love and God bless,

Hazel

"While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn." ~ Luke 2:6-7

Your Love Never Fails

This song perfectly fits my current situation. It's amazing.

Your Love Never Fails - Jesus Culture

Nothing can separate
Even if I ran away
Your love never fails

I know I still make mistakes, but
You have new mercy for me everyday
Your love never fails

You stay the same through the ages
Your love never changes
There may be pain in the night
But joy comes in the morning
And when the oceans rage
I don’t have to be afraid
Because I know that you love me
And your love never fails

The wind is strong and the water’s deep, but
I’m not alone here in these open seas
'Cause your love never fails

The chasm was far too wide
I never thought I’d reach the other side
But your love never fails

You make all things, work together for my good

None But Jesus

In this life, nothing is sugary sweet...

Before I get ready for school, I feel burdened to post something to share with my readers. Lately, for these past few weeks, even for the last couple of months, I've been idle. Not only from my blog, but also from God. My daily devotions were becoming an obligation instead of a delighted routine I look forward to every single day. It wasn't just at home; even at church I felt His absence. You would know when He was far from you. You would. Imagine.. going to church to feel God's presence, but you come home feeling as empty as you went. Tell me how vain it must have been.
I know I'm being brutally honest in telling you this, but all of us must face it. In this life, nothing is always sugary sweet and smooth. Even the greatest people go through difficult situations and some of them may even fall into deep misery. Nevertheless, we must keep on moving forth in spite of the circumstances. The term "giving up" isn't listed in our dictionary.
What I've learned from this is our God is SO good. Indescribably good. He is loving and compassionate. He could've taken my life before I confessed my sins to him, but he didn't. He has let me live to this very day. I give him thanks and praise for every breath that I take.

Actually, one of the reasons for my indolence was caused by fear. Fear of adhering to His will. I was afraid he would withdraw from me what I loved most. It's happened to me more than once in such a brief time; I was in massive depression. It's very ironic, since I keep saying this and that about obeying and completely relying on Him. Yet I am struggling to overcome the same obstacle. I was not lying. But I didn't know how difficult it is to do until I fully experienced it myself.
It made me realize I was being selfish, egotistical, greedy; only caring about MY needs, MY wants.. ALL mine. When you come to think about it, when was the last time you did something good for God? It doesn't have to be amazing.. just good.

This wouldn't be so hard to do if you had nothing you wanted to retain; if everything was going satisfactorily 'according to plan'. So when the time comes, you take a step back and hesitate on the decision you have made. "Wait... you're telling me to do what, God? There's no way I'd give that up. No way."

He gave us His Son. His Treasure. Himself.

Image from Google Images

Here is a verse that I found during my morning devotion:

"What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ."

~ Philippians 3:8

Paul is such a great coach. I admire his faith and loyalty in Jesus Christ. Despite how cruel and nasty of a sinner he was - condemning all Christians in his time - he was one of Jesus's most influential later apostles.

It's truly remarkable how one simple verse could change the way I fix my mindset. I was reminded of how beautiful His sacrifice was, and the fact that He, as my father, knows what's best for me. He has made everything/one to be just as good as He is. He has planned my life for my benefits. My desires, my demands, are nothing compared to what He has prepared.

You may know what to do, but He knows better. The best. 1 Thessalonians 5:17 says, "Pray continually." I hope all of you had a great Thanksgiving. I definitely have loads to be thankful for!


Much love,
Hazel

Blue Gravity

I'm feeling a little inarticulate at this particular moment, so this post will be exceptionally special. Just last night, after a rather peculiar incident, I decided to scribble down my experience in my book of songs and I thought I'd share this one with my readers.

------*

I'm losing words to say to you

There's nothing else that I can do

And this thriving silence in our dialogue,

It corrupts my hopeful dreamery

Your eyes tell me one thing

Yet what I'm acquiring

Is not my prior expectation

Which was full of sweet-scented beads

I may be too blind to see

Thus am hesitant to make believe

Baby, will you please answer me

Only then I can stop to grieve

Can you feel the cold breeze rushing in

Benumbing all my simple senses

I try to stay up, but oh blue, blue gravity

Keeps pulling me down, harder every time

© Hazel 2009

No, I have not yet died

My sincere apologies for being M.I.A. for over a month. I know not a lot of people read my blog, but for those of you who do, I'm terribly sorry! I'm just going to be honest with you. In the past month where I had been "idle", I was not incontrovertibly compelled to write anything on my blog. Lack of inspiration, I suppose. But don't fret! I am reading a gazillion books at the moment, so hopefully ideas will spew forth my meager, languid mind.

To start off this "new" beginning, I will open up with a poem from C.S. Lewis. His book, Mere Christianity is actually one of the books I am currently reading. He is a kick-ass genius!! [As mentioned on my facebook status]. So far, I have only read one of his published works: The Screwtape Letters. His works are rather difficult to ingest (based on my attempt to read The Pilgrim's Regress - I drove myself crazy!!), ergo I am going slow but steady, taking my time to read every single possible word written. Needless to say, I am obsessed with his writing!

I don't know which one of his works this was quoted from, as I found it on the internet. It is nevertheless a beautiful prayer, gracefully written in his clever wit. Hence, my urge to share it with the world. As for the accuracy of meaning of this poem/prayer, I'll leave that to your individual interpretation.

They tell me, Lord, that when I seem
To be in speech with you.
Since but one voice is heard, it’s all a dream
One talker aping two.

Sometimes it is, yet not as they
Conceive it. Rather, I
Seek in myself the things I hoped to say,
But lo!, my wells are dry.

Then, seeing me empty, you forsake
The listener’s role and through
My dumb lips breathe and into utterance wake
The thoughts I never knew.

And thus you neither need reply
Nor can; thus, while we seem
Two talkers, thou art One forever, and I
No dreamer, but thy dream.

- C.S. Lewis, Prayer

Picture source: Google Images

Quiz from Feby

It's 4:00am and I am bored.

ABC About You Questions:
A - AVAILABLE: No
B - BIRTHDAY: Oct. 8
C - CRUSHING ON: Aspirin tablets!
D - DRINK YOU LAST HAD: water, i believe
E - EASIEST PERSON TO TALK TO: JEN S. =)
F - FAVORITE SONG: i don't only have one..
G - GUMMY BEARS OR GUMMY WORMS: worms =9
H - HOMETOWN: Jakarta
I - IN LOVE WITH: JC
J - JUGGLE: sometimes
K - KILLED SOMEONE: no..
L - LONGEST CAR RIDE: don't remember
M- MILKSHAKE FLAVOR: strawberry
N - NUMBER OF SIBLINGS: 1 younger, dearest brother <3
O - ONE WISH: ........................... :)
P - PERSON YOU CALLED LAST: Myra
**Q IS NOT HERE!!**
R- REASON TO SMILE: 'cause everything gets better when you smile..
S - SONG YOU LAST HEARD: "That Day" by Natalie Imbruglia
T - TIME YOU WOKE UP: late
U - UNDERWEAR COLOR/PATTERN: you mean UMBRELLA colour :P
V - VEGETABLE(S): BROCCOLI, green beans, lettuce
W - WORST HABIT: wasting time
X - X-RAYS YOU'VE HAD: teeth, knee
Y - YOYOS ARE: retractable??
Z - ZODIAC SIGN: Libra

Random Questions About You:
Spell your name without vowels: Hzl
What color do you wear most?: almost every colour
Least favorite color? yellow.. =P
What are you listening to? the night wind
Are you happy with your life right now? ooohhh yeaaahhhh.. =) always have been, always will be
What is your favorite class in school? BREAK TIME! oops.. that's not even a class
When do you start back at school/college? i'm in school for the summer T_T
Are you outgoing? depends
Favorite pair of shoes? flats! They're so simple.. you can throw them on wherever and whenever. They never go out of style
Where do you wish you were right now? I'm already where I want to be

THE CANS:
Can you dance? I'd like to think so. I used to, though
Can you tie a cherry stem with your mouth? No
Can you whistle? a LITTLE.
Write with both hands? hmm.. I'm not ambidextrous.. but I can try
Walk with your toes curled? sometimes yes! and also when i'm sitting down =D

THE DO'S:
Do you believe there is life on other planets? my knowledge hasn't come that far
Do you believe in miracles? YES
Do you believe in magic? naahh..
Love at first sight? NO. But when you were in kindergarten you probably did..
Do you believe in Satan? I believe in the notion of his existence
Do you believe in Santa? No, I'm past kindergarten :P
Do you know how to swim? I used to take swimming lessons.. but I'm not a decent swimmer
Do you like roller coasters? YES YES YES, AND YES!!! need I say more?
Do you think you could handle the stuff they eat on those reality shows? probably not.

THE HAVES:
Have you ever been on a plane? how do you think i got to Canada??
Have you ever asked someone out? to a casual hangout, yes; to a date, no
Have you ever been asked out by someone? Y
Have you ever been to the ocean? the closest i ever got to is a beach.. but i still love oceans :)
Have you ever painted your nails? PSHT.. obviously

THE WHATS:
What is the temperature outside? don't know.. but it's kind of chilly in my room
What was the last restaurant you ate at? hmm... Pho Dau Bo?
What was the last thing you bought? i seriously don't remember
What was the last thing on TV you watched? a scene from the old "Friday the 13th" at Myra's

THE WHOS:
Who was the last person you IM'd? Fiona
Who was the last person you took a picture of? lil' Rachel! haha
Who was the last person you said I love you to? EVERYBODY!!! I love you all =)

CRYING SECTION:
Ever really cried your heart out: come on.. i'm a girl
Ever cried yourself to sleep? yeshh
Ever cried on your friend's shoulder? hmmm.... physically, i don't remember
Ever cried over the opposite sex? of course!
Do you cry when you get an injury? depends on how severe it is
Do certain songs make you cry? i'm a very emotional person, you know

HAPPY SECTION.
Are you a happy person? YEAAAHHHH!!! :D:D
What can make you happy? anything and anyone ^,^
Do you wish you were happier? sure..
Can music make you happy? certainly!

LOVE SECTION.
How many times have you had your heart broken? this is getting personal..
Have you ever loved someone so much that you'd die for them? like Jesus?

LOOK AT ME.
What is your current hair color?: black
Current piercings?: ear lobes
Have any tattoos?: naah..
Eye color?: dark brown

IN A BOY:
Favorite eye color: doesn't matter
Short or long hair: short. long hair seems greasy to me :P
Height: at least 4" taller than me muahahaha
Best clothing: as long as it "makes sense"

HAVE YOU EVER
Been to jail: nope
Ran away from home: nope
Laughed so hard you cried: HAHA yes
Cried in school: uhuh
Done something really stupid that you still laugh at today: MAYBE.. o_O
Gone skinny dipping: no.. lol although i think that idea is pretty funny

THIS OR THAT
Pepsi or Coke: what's the difference??
McDonald's or Burger King: in case of an emergency, Burger King!
Single or Group Dates: depends..
Chocolate or Vanilla: chocolate
Strawberries or Blueberries: blueberries
Meat or Veggies: poultry (haha)
TV or Movie: hard choice..
Guitar or Drums?: guitar =)
Adidas or Nike: *_*
Chinese or Mexican: food-wise?? i like tacos & pitas =9 Chinese food is a bit too conventional for me, since I'm already Asian anyway
Cheerios or Corn Flakes: CHEERIOS FTW
Cake or Pie: depends
MTV or VH1: neither

Waiting in patience *UPdated*

Just about a couple of days ago, I was prepping to post about patience. Little did I know, long story short, let's just say now is the perfect time to do so.

It never ceases to amaze me how awesome and glorious our God truly is. You may think that whenever you feel distant from him, He's not there.. like he's somewhere up in the air, far away from you. When in fact, He never leaves your side. He's inside your heart. That's how it is and that's how it's going to be for the rest of your lives. For me, Jesus is the ONE person who understands me most thoroughly. He knows me like no other person would. Even before I utter my deepest desires, he already knows what I want, what I long for.

Many times, my faith has been put to the test. And out of brutal honesty I dare to say that it is not by my works and what I've done that I'm still standing where I am. Our God is a faithful and loving God whose grace and mercy never stop pouring. He always takes me back into his loving arms, despite the number of times I've ignored his voice. He simply

n e v e r

s t o p s

c h a s i n g

m e.

I can't ask for more in my life. He's my ultimate wholeness. He's the most essential component of my life.. and he certainly IS the pivotal destination I'm running towards.

Sorry, I seem to have digressed more than I should.

We, as humans, possess a nature of being anxious and overly eager to have something we want.. and we want it NOW. "If we don't get it now, then forget about it." When we don't get what we want, we tend to give up on it and as a result, we miss out on the sublime outcome that may spring up from waiting.

In relationship cases, for example, there are couples who grow impatient with quarrels and end up breaking up in the most painful ways. Maybe they're not meant to be.. sure, but instead of looking onward to the beautiful friendship they could have created, they've produced more enemies for each other. You know, not all disagreements have to end in pain. I believe they were created so that we could love and understand one another better.

There are also couple-to-be's who become restive because "the time" still has yet to come. Again, they rush things; at length, things fall apart.

For you singles out there who are yet to be met with your helper/spouse, be patient. I'm speaking for myself as well, so I know exactly how it feels to wait.. especially when time drags on and on and on. Been there. Through that. But during that period of time, that's when I got to immaculately feel His presence.. know His love.. know MY love for HIM. Why? Because when there's nobody else to focus on except God, it's like.. indescribably beautiful. Your utmost attention is paid to Him. Your love stays undivided for Him. Your time will be devoted just for Him. What a wonderful, peaceful life with Your Creator. I long for this more than words can say.

RUSH. Is it necessary? God has made everything beautiful at its own time (Ecc. 3:11), which means everything has been set to happen whenever God has set it to be. So why are we rushing?? Are we trying to control our life, or are we letting God reign in every aspect of it? First of all.. God is God and this life that we have is entirely His (as we have been given the opportunity to borrow it from Him). Who are we trying to take control of it???

Secondly, our lives have been planned by the creator (Jeremiah 29:11). God says that He has planned our lives to prosper us. What more can we ask from that?

When we become too focused on one thing, we tend to forget about all the other ones. Most importantly, our paramount attention should be on God, the author of life. If He hasn't answered our prayers, it doesn't mean that he doesn't hear or care about you. Nor is he busy with "other things". He simply wants to train you and test your patience with Him. While worldly things wear us down, focusing on our Loving Father is not an option. He loves us more than his own life. He considers us more precious than ANYTHING at all. So when that time comes where we have to wait, think of it as this:

"Sometimes God says, 'Wait'. When He does, His intent is always that He would become more precious to you during the waiting than if he had said 'Yes' immediately." -- Unknown

I don't know with you, but for me, I'd rather wait on the Lord until he gives me a green light. I would rather take more time to delight in the beauty of waiting than to rush and fast forward everything that's been offered for me to enjoy. Besides, if we wait for Him, we find favour from the Lord and whatever it is we may be waiting for, will be greatly blessed. Hence, HAPPINESS EVER AFTER =).

"Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD." ~ Psalm 27:14

Take care all,
xoxo Hazel

Hillsong United - Rest in You

Your faithfulness endures always
Where mountains fall and reason fails
And You calm the raging seas
And You calm the storms in me, again

All I know is I find rest in You
All I know is I find rest in You

My heart will praise throughout the night
Where singing seems a sacrifice
Your grace is all I need
Your grace is all I need

“Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will never pass away.”

~ Matthew 24:35

Lest we judge

At particular times, I assume things, people, situations.. assumptions that come from my own judgement and opinion-- which we all know can be spurious and misleading. I mean, not only mine, but when we think of the word 'assume', what do we think of? The word itself means that we're concluding a verdict without tangible proof. Usually assumptions are made of one's thoughts and observations.. not a factual evidence that's been proven to be true.
Honestly, I've been guilty over this matter. I'm going to be forthright and tell you that all this time, my current perception on a certain person has been distorted, simply because of what my thoughts were telling me about this person. I know we've had rough patches along the way, but somehow, slowly, I'm being consumed by chattering teeth and jabbering mouths around me, and little by little, it's altering my point of view on this person.. in a negative way.

-----*

I feel like a hypocrite. I keep telling people to guard their mouths and actions, yet I, myself, am having this problem with someone whom I dearly love and care about.

This made me think about how non-Christians inspect Christians from their goggles. Are they seeing fundamental hypocrites or are they seeing genuinely loving, caring individuals who want to make the world a better place? One of our biggest problems as Christians is that we often speak too soon, while shutting our eyes and covering our ears with both our palms. Sometimes we refuse to see or hear because we're too busy to express what we know. Not to mention, half the things we do/say in church don't even reflect our daily lives. We may think we know so much, when in reality, we are the ignorant ones -- the less knowledgeable. David Kinnaman writes in his book: "Christianity has become bloated with blind followers who would rather repeat slogans than actually feel true compassion and care." (pg. 15).

Don't get me wrong on this. I, with no doubt whatsoever, am a firm believer and follower of Christ, who is passionately interested in The Living One. In spite of that, I dislike the idea that this world has placed on the word 'Christian'. Many people today view Christians as hyper-spiritual, goodie-two-shoes back-stabbers who judge others and tend to slip from their 'churchful' words. From the bottom of my (currently) honest heart, I just want to point out that we, as Christians will only keep polluting the world if we continue to speak without acting on what we preach. Non-Christians who are yet to know who Jesus is won't just listen to our bogus words about some God they don't know. Without actions to back us up on our words, they will mean nothing.

I mean, who are we to look down on the adultresses? Who are we to despise and be intimidated by homosexuals? Who are we to scorn the alcoholics? Who are we to look at these people differently? WHO ARE WE TO JUDGE AT ALL??! We, Christians aren't even any better than the prostitutes, homosexuals, trans, drunkards, beggars.. We're not. Who are we to even hate George Bush? Believe it or not, at one time or another, we've actually been little George Bushes in our own communities. Even The King of kings, the Lord of all highest lords love them the same. We're not God and we still judge. Who are we??!! It doesn't matter how small or infrequent we sin; we're just as bad one way or the other. We all need Jesus to be saved and forgiven. Matthew 7:1-5 says, 1"Do not judge, or you too will be judged. 2For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.
3"Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? 4How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? 5You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye."

I, as one of the millions of people who claim to be Christian, would like to apologize for the inconsistency in my words and actions. I have been one of the many who have marred the image of Christianity. Christianity is supposed to be all about love because God himself IS love (1 John 4:16). Yet in our world today, there's been a lot of unnecessary things added to it.. that aren't even supposed to be there. I'm sorry that I haven't shown enough love. I'm sorry if I have judged and mistreated you. I'm sorry that I feel bad for the oppressed and less fortunate, yet still do nothing about them. I'm sorry that bad things about other people still occasionally ring on my mouth. I'm sorry that we have been "mini-converters" who are desperately trying to "convert" people into our 'circle'.

It really breaks my heart to see how the notion of Christianity has now been corrupted with fallacious concepts. In the bible, where does it say that we can reject the homosexuals? Does it make a clear statement that we could disdain the adultresses or the alcoholics, the cheaters, the liars, the thieves..? Jesus forgave them all. Back then, prostitutes were considered the lowest of the lowest in their hierarchical system. Most of them died by stoning. But when one came to Jesus and repented her sins, she was forgiven straight away. Not the day after, not an hour later, but immediately. It's because we, Christians sometimes feel like we're superior.. we're above everyone else.. with our faith and all. It's true that we've been saved by grace through faith (Ephesians 2:8), but instead of embracing it with joy and love, we take pride in that-- a kind of self-admiration. We must always remember that we didn't receive grace because of who we are or what we did.. but by the unconditional love of Christ. And if Christ loves all, then why shouldn't we??

Let us do a reality self-check by asking ourselves this question: am I loving enough? Am I being a brother/sister to my friends who need me? Do I show enough compassion to the hurting, broken, and lost? Are people seeing Jesus Christ in the way I live my life? In 1 John 4:20, it says: "If anyone says, "I love God," yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen." From here, we can look into our full-body mirror and examine ourselves.. am I truly living in love? Or am I just living by my human judgments?

As for my case, I'm in the last position to assume or judge. I'm sorry if I have previously judged or hurt my fellow brothers or sisters in Christ. From now on, I invite all of us, including those who are non-Christian to minimize your judgments and start (if you haven't) spreading love to ALL mankind. No more assumptions, no more judgments. The only person who has absolute authority to judge us is The Mighty Lamb who sits on the throne of heaven. As Christians, our job is to show the love of God to those who haven't seen/felt it; to let them see Jesus shine in our lives.

"There is only one Lawgiver and Judge, the one who is able to save and destroy. But you—who are you to judge your neighbour?" ~ James 4:12

Take care and God bless,
Hazel

I'd better be sure according to you..

Picture source: Google Images

Wow, I'm sorry for the lack of updates these days. After my old posts got deleted, I kind of lost the desire to write posts anymore. But it's not like anyone besides Jennifer ever reads this, right? Haha. It's not that I'm lazy or anything, but I just don't as much time currently.. which is pretty ironic when you think about it. 'Cause while I was in school, I had no problem writing and updating every day, but now that it's summer, I don't have that much available time. It makes me wonder..........

At the moment, I am juggling summer school and work - which I have to admit, has been fun thus far. It's very tiring, but it's better than not doing anything at all. I don't know with you, but if I feel like I'm not doing much, I'll feel unproductive and it'll make me lazy to even do anything at all. Now that I have a responsibility, I'm obligated to fulfill my duties (that sounded cheesy).

So things have been working out quite nicely, I must say. Of course there are those booger situations and remarks, but they're actually what make me grow spiritually and as a person. That's what makes life even merrier, because what is life without challenges? Even the more reason to love it! One of the things I've learned from my experiences is: Keep loving your neighbour no matter what. People might have hurt you in multiple ways with what they said or what you heard about yourself. But it's stated several times in the bible, to Love your neighbour as you love yourself (Leviticus 19:18). And if they attack you, you musn't seek revenge, rather to "turn the other cheek" (Matthew 5:39) - the one on your face, that is. Or is it??

Anyways, my point is, it really won't be of any importance to sweat over small things like that. We will always be assaulted with endless false accusations and the devil will use more people to walk up and spit in our faces. Jesus endured all that perfectly well. Ultimately, it is God's word that prevails (Mark 13:31).

On to the next BIG thing, I received my 2-week's paycheque yesterday. To be completely honest with you, I wasn't looking forward to it. More like I totally forgot about it until my co-worker reminded me. *Oops..* That's one of the exciting things that happened this week. I was going to mark out Earl Grey Tea, but it was too late, so I better not forget it today (end of the week.. or else I won't get my markout this week.. boohoo). Oh, I was making drinks on the bar the other day and a customer ordered a "grande black tea lemonade". It was during the busy hours and there were a million of people lining up (not really), and I was a bit-- understating --freaking out. Being a newbie that I am, I made this drink, with the correct recipe, but not in the right size. I was repeating the order out loud "grande black tea lemonade", yet I was measuring tall size. I ended up giving her a tall-sized BTL for a grande price. I'm sorry, lady.. whoever you were.

At the present time, I'm addicted to the song "Ink & Tight Jeans" by The Real Efforts of Real People. I don't know why, but I started to get hooked on this kind of songs. For some reason, they'd sound more 'real'.. if I were to compare them to Miley Cyrus's hits.

All in all, in this update, I just want to say that I'm very thankful for everything that has happened in my life - whether it be bad or good, stupid or clever, snagging or advantaging. I'll give you this wonderful verse of the day: "Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." ~ James 1:17
I think it beautifully conveys its message.


Take care, children of God.

Love you all in Christ,
Hazel


"Iced venti, vanilla, nonfat, no whip white chocolate mocha........."

Salutations!

Congratulations, my dear graduates!! Keep moving forward, don't ever give up, and always reach for the sky. Set your ambitions up high and work hard to attain it.

"No mountain's too high for you to climb,
All you have to do is have some climbing faith.
No river's too wide for you to make it across;
All you have to do is believe it when you pray."

God bless you all!! =) Much love alwayyss~~


Hazel

Footprints

One night I dreamed
I was walking along the beach with the Lord.
Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.
In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.
Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,
other times there were one set of footprints.

This bothered me because I noticed
that during the low periods of my life,
when I was suffering from
anguish, sorrow or defeat,
I could see only one set of footprints.

Picture source: Google Images

So I said to the Lord,
"You promised me Lord,
that if I followed you,
you would walk with me always.
But I have noticed that during
the most trying periods of my life
there have only been one
set of footprints in the sand.
Why, when I needed you most,
you have not been there for me?"

The Lord replied,
"The times when you have
seen only one set of footprints in the sand,
is when I carried you."

Mary Stevenson, 1984

Mold

There is an encouraging story I found while roaming around on the internet that will remind us of God's love and righteousness.

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The Potter and His Clay

There was a couple who used to go to England to shop in the beautiful stores. This was their twenty-fifth wedding anniversary. They both liked antiques and pottery and especially teacups.

One day in this beautiful shop they saw a beautiful teacup. They said, "May we see that? We've never seen one quite so beautiful." As the lady handed it to them, suddenly the teacup spoke.

"You don't understand," it said. "I haven't always been a teacup. There was a time when I was red and I was clay. My master took me and rolled me and patted me over and over and I yelled out, 'let me alone,' but he only smiled, 'Not yet'".

"Then I was placed on a spinning wheel," the teacup said, "and suddenly I was spun around and around and around. 'Stop it! I'm getting dizzy!" I screamed. But the master only nodded and said, "'Not yet.'" Then he put me in the oven. I never felt such heat. I wondered why he wanted to burn me, and I yelled, and I knocked at the door. I could see him through the opening and I could read his lips as he shook his head, 'Not yet.'

Finally the door opened, he put me on the shelf, and I began to cool. 'There, that's better,' I said. And he brushed and painted me all over. The fumes were horrible. I thought I would gag. 'Stop it, stop it!' I cried. He only nodded, 'Not yet.'

Then suddenly he put me back into the oven, not like the first one. This was twice as hot and I knew I would suffocate. I begged. I pleaded. I screamed. I cried. All the time I could see him through the opening nodding his head, saying, 'Not yet.' Then I knew there wasn't any hope. I would never make it. I was ready to give up. But the door opened and he took me out and placed me on the shelf. One hour later he handed me a mirror and said, "Look at yourself." And I did. I said, "That's not me; that couldn't be me. It's beautiful. I'm beautiful."

"I want you to remember, then," he said, "I know it hurt to be rolled and patted, but if I just left you, you'd have dried up. I know it made you dizzy to spin around on the wheel, but if I had stopped, you would have crumbled. I know it hurt and it was hot and disagreeable in the oven, but if I hadn't put you there, you would have cracked. I know the fumes were bad when I brushed and painted you all over, but if I hadn't done that, you never would have hardened. You would not have had any color in your life, and if I hadn't put you back in that second oven, you wouldn't survive for very long because the hardness would not have held. Now you are a finished product. You are what I had in mind when I first began with you."

By: Chelsea Chin
Taken from: http://www.soon.org.uk/stories/storyoct.htm

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Often times in life, we are faced with situations that we sometimes can't even bear thinking about. Let alone undertaking these things; we frequently whine and complain over what is being thrown at us. Whether it'd be involving people, objects, emotions.. we grumble about it. It's only human nature to fuss, but seriously, do we ever look at the brighter side of the matter? Or do we only scrutinize from a one-sided apprehension?

Like this analogy of the potter and his clay, who knew what that teacup had to go through before it turned to be a beautiful piece of work. God often disciplines us in life to prepare us to be strong and teach us how to endure the hardship that we encounter. We get impatient and our minds filled with inquiries of when it's all going to be over or when this pain is coming to an end. Life comprises of different phases. As a baby grows older with time, so our spiritual maturity deepens as our intimacy with the Lord advances. Jesus teaches us to possess the strength he had when he came into this world.

But just because you've been taken to a higher level in your spiritual life, it doesn't mean things will get easier. Believe it or not, everything will become sour; your life will probably turn upside down (and it can be either good or bad). However, this is God's way of disciplining and training his children, simply because of His great love and delight in us. "Because the LORD disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in." ~ Proverbs 3:12

11 layers of Hazel

This is what you call boredom.

Layer One: On the Outside
Name:	: Hazel
Birthday:	: 8th day of the 10th month.
Current Location:	: Canada
Eye Color:	: Brown
Hair Color:	: Black
Righty or Lefty:	: Righty
Zodiac Sign:	: Libra?? I don't believe in astrology.
Layer Two: On the Outside
Your Heritage:	: My parents' genes.
Your Fears:	: Rats
Your Weakness:	: Hmm....... sinning??
Goal:	: Glorifying Him in everything I do.
Layer Three: Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow
Your thoughts first waking up:	: SHOULD BE about HIM :)
Your bedtime:	: Hah.. don't even ask.
Your most missed memory:	: Childhood T_T
Layer Four: Your Pick
Pepsi or Coke:	: Doesn't matter
McDonald or Burger King	: McD's
Single or Group dates:	: Both kinds are nice =)
Adidas or Nike:	: I don't care
Lipton Tea or Nestea:	: Aren't they both similar in taste anyway??
Chocolate or Vanilla:	: Both
Cappuccino or Coffee:	: Coffee!
Layer Five: Do You?
Smoke:	: NO
Have a crush:	: Not currently
Think you've been in love	: Yes
Want to get married:	: Most definitely
Believe in yourself:	: Not exactly in myself.. but in the One who made me ^^. But since He lives in me.. so yes.
Think you're a health freak	: Haha.. absolutely not
Layer Six: In the Past Month
Drank alcohol:	: Nope
Gone to the mall:	: Of course!
Eaten Sushi:	: Yes
Gone skating:	: No
Dyed your hair:	: No.. I haven't had the chance to.
Layer Seven: Have Your Ever?
Played a stripping game:	: Bwahhaha.. nooo
Gotten beaten up:	: Physically, never.. emotionally, all the time. Hahaha.. just kidding.
Changed who you were to fit in:	: Hmm.. I don't think so. Even though I THOUGHT I did, I don't think it really happened.
Layer Eight: Getting Old
Age you're hoping to be married:	: 23-25
Layer Nine: Perfect Mate
Best Eye Color:	: *Sighs*
Best Hair Color:	: Please refer to prev. question
Short or Long Hair:	: ----------//----------
Layer Ten: What were you doing...
1 MINUTE AGO:	: Filling this out
1 HOUR AGO:	: Reading something
1 DAY AGO:	: Staying home
1 YEAR AGO:	: Doing my homework
Layer Eleven: Finish the Sentence
I LOVE:	: Living life
I FEEL:	: Sleepy @_@
I HATE:	: No one =)
I HIDE:	: My acne scars and blemishes =(
I MISS:	: My old friends..
I NEED:	: .. to sleep right now.

#3

I digress - it's amazing how much one's opinions can influence another person's judgments.

You can never understand how I feel; how deep I was hurting; how bad my heart was broken. I can only watch as life unfolds. Sometimes I want to scream it out loud and just spill out the contents of my heart.. but I always realize that would be a selfish action. The world doesn't revolve around me =).

Things come and go. Nonetheless, I strongly believe my entire life has been planned. There hasn't been an accidental incident. God has perfectly mapped out my life, and now I just have to live it for Him. It's these small things that make life even more beautiful.

"It's not about how hard you hit. It's about how hard you get hit and keep moving forward."

Eva Cassidy - Time After Time

Eva Cassidy - Time After Time

Lying in my bed

I hear the clock tick,

And think of you

Turning in circles confusion

Is nothing new

Flashback to warm nights

Almost left behind

Suitcase of memories,

Time after

Sometimes you picture me

I'm walking too far ahead

You're calling to me, I can't hear

What you have said

And you say go slow

I fall behind

The second hand unwinds

If you're lost you can look and you will find me

Time after time

If you fall I will catch you I'll be waiting

Time after time

If you fall I will catch you I'll be waiting

Time after time

Time after time

After your picture fades and darkness has

Turned to grey

Watching through windows I’m wondering

If you’re OK

And you say go slow

I fall behind

The drum beats out of time

Our love vs. His Love

Picture source: Google Images

The other day, as I was doing my morning devotions, I was submerged into this unusual state of disclosure. Let's just say God really revealed His love to me. It changed my general perception on love. I had been struggling, striving to love God. It's not that I don't, but I'd always feel bad.. because I knew I'd fail. Spare some time to think about the TRUE meaning of loving God. It's not as easy as saying the cliche 'I love you, Lord' a hundred million times, yet do nothing about it. Going to church, uttering profound words in prayers, singing praises, helping people.. is that it? No. It's not enough. It surely is ironic because the phrase 'I love you, Lord' consistently rings on my lips, yet I'm still such a fool when it comes to love.

I then realized that no matter how hard we try to love God, we can never love Him the way he does us. It occurred to me that there really isn't a point in TRYING to love God, rather, we should just focus on His love for us. That way, we can love him back without trying. I want to take you back and compare two of the most significant people in the bible: Peter and John. Do you remember the conversation between Peter and Jesus before the crucifixion? Jesus asks Peter if he loved him.. 3 times. Here is the dialogue from John 21:15-17 (NIV).

¹⁵When they had finished eating, Jesus said to Simon Peter, "Simon son of John, do you truly love me more than these?"
"Yes, Lord," he said, "you know that I love you."
Jesus said, "Feed my lambs."
¹⁶Again Jesus said, "Simon son of John, do you truly love me?"
He answered, "Yes, Lord, you know that I love you."
Jesus said, "Take care of my sheep."
¹⁷ The third time he said to him, "Simon son of John, do you love me?"
Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, "Do you love me?" He said, "Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you."

You know what happens next, right? Peter denies Jesus.. 3 times. He told people he didn't know who Jesus was (Luke 22:57-60).

Conversely, take a look at John and his focus on GOD'S love for him. He considers himself 'the disciple whom Jesus loved'. Moreover, it is in the gospel of John (and his other 3 books in the bible) that we find loads of verses and teachings about love. In fact, the most well-known bible verse is in John 3, verse 16: "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life." You see, John did not boast his love for the Lord. He didn't try as hard as Peter to show Jesus his love for him.. instead, he manifested God's love THROUGH himself. Didn't Jesus love ALL of his disciples? Yes, He did. But, out of all the 12 who were with Him, only one of them heartily UNDERSTOOD God's love for him.. and that was John.

The Law in the book of Deuteronomy says, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength." (Deut. 6:5). This is by far the first and greatest commandment, indeed. But if we were to expand and explicate this verse, we would get more than a billion words to meticulously explain what it means. What does it REALLY mean to love God? I'll leave that for you to ponder on as you deepen your relationship with Him.

We are not perfect. Our love fails. I'm sorry to break it up to you, but that's truth. We don't have the patience to love someone unconditionally.. let alone having eternity to sustain that patience. Think about this: how often do you love God? Reality checks in. Sometimes. Yeah, when he does this.. or when he does that.. or whatever. All the time? Never. Not one of you is able to love God ALL the time. If you say you are, you actually don't because it'll make you a l-i-a-r. We're all sinners and by what we were redeemed? By HIS love. By our love for him? No, but by HIS love and grace FOR us. We weren't required to love God in order to be saved (1 John 4:10). He loved us first (1 John 4:19).

This is what made me feel so guilty. How can a small, unworthy sinner like me be tremendously loved and adored by such an enormous God who created the universe? But, that's the whole point of it. If everybody in the world was righteous, there would be no need for Jesus.

I want to love God.. but not out of my own strength. I want to love him unshakably, but not BY my own power. What I want to do is to just enjoy the love of God which has been revealed to me through Jesus Christ (himself). Does this mean I'll stop loving God? No. I will stop loving God with my OWN might.. but let Him love ME, so that I can love him back with the love He's given me. It's kind of hard to elucidate, but here's a clearer way of saying it: 'you can't give something you don't have.' In other words, if we are not aware of God's love for us, how can we love Him back? It breaks God's heart to see broken promises, lying lips resuming its deeds.. people who constantly say they love him, yet not do it.

One of Jesus's missions on this earth was to set an example for us. He is like a template which we draw from.. the instruction guide to our lives. Each and every single day, we are to be more and more like him in what we do and say. He has showed and given us His genuine love. Now we are invited to love him back with that Love. The bible doesn't say we are constrained to love God, rather it is an open, cordial invitation. When we have come to discern God's love for us, it would be difficult to not do the same for Him. You can't help but to fall deeper and deeper in love with our beautiful Saviour.

I'm not saying we should stop loving God. I'm just reminding us that His love always comes first. He knows we will fail. God sees right through us. That's why we shouldn't be proud and boastful about our love for God.. or we're going to end up like Peter who incontrovertibly broke God's heart into myriad fragments. However, I'm sure Peter was forgiven in the end and is now in heaven with God =). I don't know if this has any relation whatsoever, but Peter's life ended by murder, while John died naturally. Jesus even bestowed his mother upon John before He died on the cross (John 19:26). Wow.. he really was the disciple whom Jesus loved. Or should we say, he was the disciple who TRULY knew Jesus's love.

"And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them." (1 John 4:16). What is it to love God? To love God is to keep his commandments (1 John 5:3). How do we do it? There's a lot of other references in the bible. One of them is to love your neighbour as you love yourself. (Leviticus 19:18).

It's easy to say we love something/one, but to fully comprehend love, is a very difficult matter. This doesn't end here, though. There are deeper meanings to what we're able to distinguish thus far. I'll end this post with a passage from Paul's letter to the Ephesians:

"... And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God." ~ Ephesians 3:17-19

May you be more tactful of God's love for you because there's no other love, greater than the One He has sent for us... Himself.


Love in Him,
Hazel

Never be the same..

"... But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead..." ~ Philippians 3:13

During my devotional time today, I was shown this song:

I will never be the same again,
I can never return, I've closed the door.
I will walk apart, I'll run the race
And I will never be the same again.

I literally broke down into tear bullets as I felt God's powerful and tangible presence, telling me to not be afraid. I surrendered my life to him once more; everything, not just the best, able, mighty, strong part of me, but ALL of it. The weak and meek, helpless child, desperate for the love of the Saviour.. I gave him full permission to take me, use me, and fill me with his unquenchable fire. I'm devoting all there is to ME and I'm not taking it back.

I'm sure there are many people out there who can relate to my situation. Having to undergo a sour past, crammed with countless painful moments and regrets you don't want to recall. We've been to a ditch, where it was dark, muddy and dirty. We've felt so alone in the dead of silence, hearing not a voice but the sound of train moving so rapidly. We were blinded by the luminescence of the world that was stripping us away from our conscience. Making wrong choices, doing the same mistakes, hopeless as someone trying to catch their own shadow.

Compared to the people who really have been there, I can't say that I've experienced an extreme downfall. However, there were times in my life when I doubted God so much and I felt like it was the end of the relationship between me and Him because I thought I've had enough of it. I was on the verge of giving up. I was tired of living different lives, exhausted from having this weight on my shoulders, walking endlessly without a destination. I started to use my own abilities to solve problems and walk the paths I'd chosen for myself. I've had one too many heartbreaks, cried until I ran out of tears, ventured to see if there's even anything more to life. I inherently tried to solve almost all of my problems by myself.

To be completely honest with you, I truly admire people who have fallen in their tracks and eventually find their way back to the Lord. I know it must have taken a great deal of miracles (Psalm 77:14) and hard work to turn them 360 degrees around. It's amazing to see how much these people have changed and how they are changing the lives of others. But you know what else is amazing? They didn't do it alone. God fought the battles for them.

The day I rededicated my entire life to the Lord, I agreed to give him absolute authority to rule over my life. I've made the decision to close the door of the past and leave it all behind; locking the door and throwing the key as far as I could. I've concurred to close my eyes to the things that have passed. I've agreed for God to use me however he wants to - whether it's going to cause little or much pain, I've already made a lifetime commitment to Jesus Christ. He is my present and my future! By this, I mean trusting him with my every problem, believing in the truth that He will not let my feet stumble, for He is the one who carries me, and most importantly, being aware of His intense love for me.

I've decided to keep advancing and anticipate the greater things God has in store for me. His love has brought me to a whole new level and you know what? I'll never be the same again because Jesus has changed my life. Just because I've been a Christian all my life, it doesn't mean that I can't be spiritually renewed. We all need that constant refreshment. But, there are two things God requires of us: to RELEASE the past and be WILLING to be used for His glory.

I'm a renewed soldier of Christ who moves forward and is no longer afraid to be a tool for God's glory. I'm ready to run the race and I'm not backing down. I know, because my God is a God of victory. He's going to fight my battles and conquer my enemies. There's no turning back nor is there giving up. Let us set our vision on the Lord and be prepared to ride on! In the end, I want to be one of the people standing firm, saying:

"I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith." ~ 2 Timothy 4:7

First all over again

I was attempting to find a way to get rid of the labels on my blog posts by selecting all of my posts and clicking the 'delete' button from the drop down menu. Guess what? It turned out that instead of my labels that were being deleted, ALL of my blog posts went down the drain. So much for writing. But now I always look at things on the brighter side. After contemplating on this incident, I don't think it was an accident. God works in ways we can't perceive. People always blame unexpected things for an accident, but if you've been hanging out with God for a long time, you know that everything has been planned, whether we know about it or not.

So, okay.. I lost all of my poems (my favourite was the C.S. Lewis one I wrote, inspired by The Screwtape Letters - hopefully I can retrieve it somehow), I deleted all of my posts, and I trashed all ideas into the dumpster.. just like that, in one quick poke at the mouse. Blogspot didn't even ask me to confirm my action. I'll take it as a way of God saying, "You've been neglecting your studies by spending too much time writing on your blog. Every deed has its outcome and consequences, and you have to take responsibility for yours". HOME RUN! Hit on the back of the head once again. I love it when the Holy Spirit downright rebukes me. It's painful, but you know it's too good to be true. It's because God loves me that he does this.

It's never too late to start right with God. I mean, He gives you time to do this, but as we may already know: time is precious, use it wisely. God can only give us so much time to start right with him. That's why when he does, we have to make use of it accordingly. On the contrary, there are times when we have to learn things the hard and painful way. But it's those things that make us grow stronger, wiser, smarter. God is a God of virtue. Just because he's easily forgiving and unfailingly loving, it doesn't make him less fair ("For the LORD is righteous, he loves justice; upright men will see his face." ~ Psalm 11:7).

Ecclesiastes 3:1-7 ~ There is a time for everything... a time to tear down and a time to build (3), a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance (4), a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them (5)..., a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away (6), a time to tear and a time to mend (7).

This has been a valuable lesson learned for me, and hopefully it won't have to occur again in the coming times =).

Love,

Miss Tardy

Picture source: Weheartit.com