God's Grace: My testimony

I have never considered myself "rich". My family has never had any surplus of money that we could lavishly spend on ourselves. Our finance has always been marginally sufficient to provide for our family's needs until this present day. In this blog post, I intend to tell you a story of my own life experience. Sometimes in the midst of various simultaneous occurrences, we may not be paying attention to what is going on. It is as if we are getting by in a breeze without truly realizing what is happening around us – to us. At least that's what it was like with me. So now I'd just like to take the next several hours to write and reminisce on my past.

I'm going to first describe my family's background in Canada, from the time before we got here up to our current life. I can barely recall the exact situation(s), but here is how the story goes. Warning: what you are about to read is a true story, not a mere fabrication.

Jakarta. It was the morning of a summer month, sometime in 2002 (sorry for my lack of memory). I remember getting myself ready in a pretty, classy-girl-type purple dress with matching shoes. My parents were anxious to get my brother and I to appear as sophisticated as possible. In spite of my parents' obvious agitation, I couldn't care less to know where we were going. My parents spoke of a very important interview we had to attend, but all I knew was how important it was for us to make it to the place on time, as the person we had an appointment with would not like it if we came late. Mind you, I was eleven and my brother was only seven years old. We were moody and upset with all the morning ruckus that had interrupted our good night sleep.

A few fusses later, we got in the car. Jakarta, oh Jakarta, how I love thee, and certainly Mother Nature thought she had done us an act of kindness. She decided to bring us the gift of an enormous flood that filled up almost the entire streets of Jakarta. The brown colour of the water is one of the things that still stay fresh in my mind. It serves as a vivid image that engulfs my recollection of this experience. Ironic. And then there we rolled in our blue, average Isuzu Panther. We trudged and drove through the heavy water, as the car's machine tried its best to survive and not fail its beloved family, which it had served for over 8 years. A few hundreds of meters away from the highway toll gate, the water got even deeper. It became more apparent just before we queued to pass the gate. Not to mention, there were probably a million other cars lining up. Our Panther straggled, struggled, fought hard and brave, until we finally had to say goodbye and went ahead without it. Time, little to your surprise, kept ticking its tongue. My parents panicked and were desperate. We saw 2 police cars parked right in front of us and my mum showcased her brilliant idea. We gave each cop 50,000 Indonesian rupiah to drive us past the cars through the gate. About 500 meters frontward, the police's sedans couldn't handle any more water and so we had to find another transportation medium to carry the four of us through the water to our destination dry, safe and sound.

And really, God does work wonders in our despair. Just as we had nearly given up, a gigantic truck with humungous wheels drove by. WHAT A MIRACLE!! We made an offer with the driver and he agreed to drive us to our stopping place. And oh boy, you cannot possibly imagine what it was like getting off of that truck! I was wearing a dress and it was getting short on me because I had an early growth spurt. Anyway, we finally arrived at our destination DRY AND UNHARMED! Glory be to God.

I looked up at the building in which we were supposed to have the interview. It said "World Trade Center". The name rang familiar in my head, but I did not have any prior knowledge to what it was. All my ignorance aside, we took the elevator up to the "Canadian Embassy" office. I actually don't remember if it actually said that, but that's the only way people would know where the Canadian Embassy is located. Yes, we were already late. The admin receptionist called us into the interview room. When I entered the room, I felt like going into the doctor's office. Somehow I became just as nervous as my parents, despite not knowing what we were doing. The first thing I noticed was how small the office was. Secondly, there was a blonde, blue-eyed man sitting in his desk, surrounded by a gazillion document papers. He was very friendly and didn't seem to mind that we came late. I suppose he understood our predicament and Jakarta's horrible weather.

Fast forward to a few months later, 17 August, 2002. "Yay, I'm on a plane for a long ride!" Although my knowledge of Canada was minimal, I was stupendously exhilarated to start my new life in this 'maple' country. Mixed with sadness and excitement, I was unwilling to leave my beloved friends and relatives behind, but I was also fueled with intense curiousity and a burning sense of adventure. I couldn't wait to see what God had in store for me. 22 long hours of flight later, we reached Canada on the same day at around 11pm, if I'm not mistaken. My uncle who lives here had picked us up from the airport. We were then driven to the townhouse where he and his family had been living for 2 years, subsequent to coming from Indonesia in 2000.

A few months following our arrival, I started wishing that this whole escapade was no more than a dream. I wanted my old life back. I was wretchedly homesick. I only knew broken English, I was made fun of at school. This was definitely not the life I had envisioned. My dad, who was once head of the International Bureau department at Bank Central Asia in Indonesia, took up a job as a part-time gardener and ship cleaner for a wealthy man before accepting a position at Toys R' Us as a sales representative. My mum was still unemployed, but a year and a half later she landed a job at Wendy's. My family, particularly my parents, have always been people of great faith. They knew these were only survival jobs they had to take to feed our family. They knew life wouldn't stay like this forever. They knew and BELIEVED that God's hand would intervene and drag us out of these difficult circumstances.

Life in Canada was damn hard. After working at Toys R' Us, my dad was hired by Sony to do administration work for its small branch office somewhere in Toronto. When my mum was finally working, she had taken up two jobs: one as a cashier/server at Wendy's during the first half of the day, and as an accountant for a company called Symcor for the other half of the day. She would drive home alone at 1 or 2 in the morning. Nevertheless, my mum was still the one who made our home – she cleaned, she cooked, she basically managed everything. It was a good thing that my mother wasn't so reliant on the maid we had back in Indonesia, as she was able to take care of everything for us. She continued working at Wendy's until she found another job at another company to do data entry. However, her salary from one job alone was not enough to support us, thus she kept her night job.

There was a period of time where my dad quit his job at Sony and pursued co-op, or interning without payment so he could work in his occupational area, which is banking. As a side note, my dad had worked in banking for over 20 years prior. Eventually after about 6 months or so, by the grace of the Lord, the Royal Bank of Canada (RBC) granted my dad a position as a teller.

In 2003, my brother was given a chance to audition for one of Toronto's most prestigious private Catholic schools, St. Michael's Choir School. He made it and enrolled in the same year. As a family, we were indubitably proud of my brother's achievements in the school, as he seemed to be doing very well. But there was a catch. The tuition itself cost $4,000-4,500 annually and was going up every year. By 2004, we were able to buy and move into a new house in the Markham area. But even so, our family's financial situation had not improved as much. Besides paying for my brother's tuition and the house mortgage, our family had no more to squander, let alone 'extra' money to buy necessities. I was 14 years old and I wanted to buy my own clothes – pretty American Eagle and Hollister blouses like those my friends owned at my age. But being aware of my family's financial stance hampered me from nagging my parents to buy me such clothing. I had gone along with my mum's suggestion to shop at Value Village – a secondhand/thrift store – instead, because if you're lucky, you could just discover a brand name shirt for much less. At the malls, I would limit myself to a $10 budget per top or bottom; $15 at most.

There was this one time, where one day my mum and my dad were talking quietly in my brother's room. My brother was in my parents' room with the TV on, while I was in mine. When I came out, I heard my mum sobbing. I presumed they had just received their credit card bill in the mail. I saw my dad and his face was a blank slate. This was the worst financial crisis that our family ever encountered. My mum later revealed that they had no money in the bank. How we pulled through could only be justified by one explanation: GOD'S INFINITE GRACE.

Oh, yes how could I almost forget about this. I think it was either in 2004 or 5, someone broke into our house. We didn't yet have an alarm system back then, so our house was totally unprotected. We didn't expect this to happen because we figured we lived in a quiet neighbourhood and everybody seemed fairly nice. But I guess that one guy thought it would be a swell idea to break into our house and search for a hidden safe in my parents' closet, which is precisely what he did. Funny story, actually. One day my brother and I had just gone home from school after my dad picked us up. My mum was working late, so she wasn't there to witness our comedic outraged expressions (no, I exaggerate. It wasn't that bad). My brother, who was 10 then, went to the living room where he noticed that there were fragments of the wood from the door all over the floor (omygosh, that rhymes!).

This is how the conversation went. I'm trying to recapitulate this as close as I can recollect.

Bro: "Dad, ada tukang yang mau betulin pintu hari ini?" which means, "Dad, is there a handyman coming to fix the door today?"

Dad: "No... gak ada kok. *Goes into the living room and checks the door.* Ooohh.. ini mah bukan rusak, tapi jebol ada yang masuk!" Translation -> "No... there's no one coming. Ooohh.. this is not broken, but someone broke into our house!"

We called 911 immediately and two cops came a couple hours later to investigate (how late). And let's just say our basement and my parents' room were literally shipwrecked. But thankfully, the person didn't take anything. Nada. Zip. Again, God's grace.

Long story short, my dad climbed up the ladder due to his excellent performance, and thrice moved to higher positions in the aforementioned bank. He now works on a managerial level for the Bank of Montreal (a miracle!). My mum applied for a job at the Consulate of the Republic of Indonesia in Canada in 2007 and has been working there ever since. As for me, I first started working a legitimate paid job when I was 16. It was at my mum's old workplace and I did data entry assignments. The next year in 2008, my dad's Nostro Accounting department at RBC had an open spot for a part-time/summer helper. I had just graduated from high school that year, and I thought it would be a great opportunity and experience for me to work there (in case you were wondering, my title was - or so it said - Reconciliation Officer). In 2009, I had a few friends working at Starbucks and they recommended me to work at the branch where they were. Also in the same year in 2009, I was offered a job as an English-Indonesian/Indonesian-English interpreter for an interpreting company. And last year in 2010, one of my friends from U of T asked me if I wanted to replace her for this administrative job because she was graduating. I accepted, and I ended up working at one of the colleges at U of T as a work-study employee. GOD'S GRACE!!!

It blows your mind, doesn't it? So it does mine. I don't know how He does it, but God really DOES work!! He NEVER stays dormant. I must say, though, I am absolutely humbled and grateful to be my parents' daughter. They are the hardest working people I know and they truly deserve to be where they are right now. My parents had never given up one bit. They worked back-breaking jobs so that we could have a good life; that they may be able to feed their children and grant them access to quality education in Canada. The moral of the story is, God will do His part, so long as we have done our best. Accompanied by unfailing faith and hard work, our effort will not count as futile, but become a fruitful seed for which we sow and later reap in time.

I'd like to encourage those people who feel like giving up to keep going. Jesus said, “Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.” (Matthew 17:20 NIV). I think this quote has more than clearly explicated that with only little faith, we can already move mountains. The problem with us is, sometimes we don't even have a little bit of faith because every turn we make renders us hopeless. But the Lord has stated that you only need faith as small as a mustard seed (link => http://classicchinny.files.wordpress.com/2010/10/mustard-seed.jpg) to make miracles happen. Don't let the end of the road mark the end of your faith. There is something else that lies beyond a dead end. My parents didn't know how our lives would transpire when we came to Canada. It was a big risk they were willing to take for the sake of their children. We had sold our house in Indonesia and my parents didn't bring a lot of money with them. When exposed to the hardship here, it had been a huge blow for all of us, but my parents kept their faith. They kept going until God brought us through to overcome every obstacle in our path.

This brings me to my next point: God's power in our weakness. I can't help but notice that it is during my weakest times that God manifests His utmost glory in my life. There is a famous quote that says something about falling being inevitable to help us know where we stand..? Well, this is God's way of putting it: "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” (2 Corinthians 12:9 NIV). We won't know where we stand until we fall to know where we fail. We won't know what strength is until we are weakened. We were already at our wit's end when the flood got worse. It was such an important interview for me and my family because it determined whether or not we were eligible for the Permanent Resident status in Canada. Moreover, my family was at our greatest financial downfall when we had run out of money. But God is a living God who provides. He never relents to care for His children, and He stays faithful even when we aren't. He never abandons. We know this because we have been witnesses to His grace and glory, and now we can testify to His formidable power. GOD'S GRACE IS SUFFICIENT. Internalize that in your heart and mind.

There are so many people who have immigrated that are still struggling to make a living in a foreign country such as Canada. I first-handedly observed and experienced how hard it was to cope with such circumstances. It could get very stressful, frustrating, and extremely depressing, but remember that God is on our side. As long as we do the best for our part, so will He do His. Be faithful. Be joyful. Be hopeful. Be patient in every trial (look up Romans 12:12 - my favourite verse). And last but not least, NEVER quit.

I hope this post has enlightened and touched those of you who are going through life's hardship. Trust me, it will not last forever. The key is to work hard and never give up. Make the best effort you possibly can.

I will end this post with another famous quote.

"Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall."

- Confucius

I love you.

xx Hazel Theresia