Late night/early morning musing

"Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country."

- John F. Kennedy

I was in the middle of chowing down the second slice of Hawaiian pizzas I had for dinner when I was reminded of an incident that happened a few months ago.

Back in January this year, a club organization on my campus called Campus for Christ held a conference event with a Vietnam War survivor named Kim Phuc. She had miraculously managed to stay alive through a brutal war that stole the lives of millions of people, despite the cost on her physical appearance, which has now become a permanent scar that remains for the rest of her life. Kim Phuc came to speak about how she found the hope that led her to be able to forgive the people who attacked and bombarded her village, her home - her life.




During this event, I helped out as one of the ticket salespersons. Halfway through the conference, I noticed a scruffy-looking, middle-aged man entering the building. The whites of his eyes were a light shade of red; his short and curly dark, greying hair was somewhat unkempt. His ragged attire did not indicate that he was there for the conference. The man came in and approached the table at which I was vending and distributing the tickets. He was wondering about what was going on in the auditorium. We gave him the general information of the conference and what it was about. Seeing a spark of interest in the man's eyes, we asked him if he would like to buy a ticket. It was $5 for non-students and $2 for those with a student ID. On the assumption that the man was not a student, he would have to pay $5 for a ticket. He said he didn't have 5 dollars. I recall that look of disappointment on his gloomy face after we told him. So we gave him a discount and reduced the price to $2. He started to feel his jacket and pant pockets, gesturing one who is scouting out some cash. I don't remember exactly what he said, but after rummaging to no avail, he apologized, thanked us, bid his good bye and made his way to the door. At that particular moment, because my heart was pounding so hard, I felt like my chest was going to be roughly ripped open; that my heart would jump out and run away.

My friends and I called to stop him from leaving and offered him a ticket for free. The man politely refused and thanked us while continuing to make his way out. We insisted, he persisted. I turned to my friend, Christine, and she gave me the same peculiar, yet empathetic look as that of which I had on my face. Other Campus for Christ committee members heard about this and were asking us what had happened. We said there was a man who seemed eager to attend the conference, but he had no money. I think we all just stood there, not knowing what to do, contemplating on this rather awkward situation. 2 minutes later, Christine and I decided to go after the man and give him the ticket anyway. We did not even think about grabbing our coats before barging out into the cold winter night. I am the farthest from being an athletic person, so a 10-second sprint for me was quite a challenge. Fortunately, we caught up with the man, who was making his way toward Queen's Park Station. We asked him one more time if he would consider accepting the ticket; he then again courteously refused with a smile.

We had a short conversation with him. Blaming my short-term memory, I fail to recollect what we talked about in detail. One thing he asked us, though, was: "Do you like Obama?" I thought this was pretty random. I said yes, I do. But the man expressed his disagreement with my answer. Anywho, this is beside the point. The three of us were standing in the cold outside the Medical Science building; conversing, sharing, when finally the man had to go. Christine and I bid him good night and headed back. I reckon he was a nice and friendly man. After we returned to the auditorium, Christine and I found a quiet corner and we prayed for the man.

Earlier tonight as I have mentioned, the memory of this incident struck me. My mind started to wander to the man: what has possibly happened to him in the course of time since our encounter? Where is he now? What is it that he does for a living? When I first laid my eyes on him, I felt a surge of love and compassion rushing out of my system. I don't know whether it was because of his outer appearance or the fact that he didn't even own a toonie to spend. It might be not be very wise to speculate without definite evidence, but my intuition tells me that the man was simply there to see if there was food. To say the worst, the man could have been a homeless, searching for food. Nevertheless, aside from any conjectures, God broke and touched my heart upon seeing that man. It made me realize how even in a developed, first-world country such as Canada, people are still hungry, dishevelled, and financially lacking.

I am not rich. I do not own a great wealth. I am not an heiress to a hotel or oil company, or whatever else it may be. My parents break their backs to make ends meet. I have a part-time job that keeps me financially supported without my parents' assistance, though it still really isn't much. Furthermore, I came from a third-world country where it holds a rank of being the 4th most populated nation in the world. The economy there, as most of us know it, is not in a very stable condition. Its people are no longer unfamiliar to the threats of corruption and mega capitalism. Gaps between the rich and the poor are ever-widening. It is not uncommon for the poverty-stricken to be marginalized. The last time I visited Indonesia back in 2006, the roads were getting smaller and slums were crowding on the sides of almost every road I drove on. One might even conclude that I am standing in the same boat as those people. I struggle, too. I don't have an easy, lenient life where I can indulge in luxuries.

I ain't no Bill Gates or Donald Trump. I don't own a charity foundation or a chain of successful international industries. I haven't yet had the money to do "great" things in the world. But what I have is a heart that wants to do something and will not relent until it is complete. Maybe a positive drastic change won't occur in this lifetime, but according to "today's generation is tomorrow's future", whatever we sow today, we will harvest in the time to come. Plant a good seed and we will reap a good crop.

Coming from a country where the environment is much worse, I would expect myself to be apathetic because I've already been so used to such a condition - the poverty, the vagrants, the slums, the trafficking, and so on. No doubt I was like that; when I was still blind. Subsequent to having been living in Canada for several years, I have become much more exposed to things that did not arouse my concern or interest prior. My views on such matters that I believed to be trivial have changed and expanded. Until now every single day, I am continuing to learn to always imagine myself living in other people's shoes. In Canada (or other developed countries, so to speak), the issue of poverty might not entirely be as big a case as that in Indonesia. However, there are other issues such as unemployment, welfare, single mothers, even natural disasters (the Asian Tsunami in 2004, Katrina), etc. This brings me to a quote by Obama.

He says:
"You know, there's a lot of talk in this country about the federal deficit. But I think we should talk more about our empathy deficit -- the ability to put ourselves in someone else's shoes; to see the world through the eyes of those who are different from us -- the child who's hungry, the steelworker who's been laid-off, the family who lost the entire life they built together when the storm came to town. When you think like this -- when you choose to broaden your ambit of concern and empathize with the plight of others, whether they are close friends or distant strangers -- it becomes harder not to act; harder not to help."

The man Christine and I met that night has become my inspiration. He serves as a tangible proof that our generation needs to step it up and improve the perception of today's humanity. How do we do that? By changing the way we see our surroundings, motivating ourselves to look beyond our individual realm. Power does not come from money alone. Power spurts from the unfaltering firmness of our resolution. I may only be one person. I am a girl. I am a student who is currently on student loan. I don't have a steady job. But I want to do something. I need to change something -- and it starts from me.


"Nobody can do everything, but everyone can do something."